I had all these great intentions of giving you a post on how I am starting the new year off with a new attitude and all that stuff. Hmm...as you can see that post didn't happen. I really do want to start 2013 with a new me, but I am not there yet. Not knowing what is next for us has really thrown me for a loop. I feel stuck.
If we were to move forward with IVF it would be with donor eggs. That helps with the time frame of everything, but I still feel the need to move forward with it sooner rather than later because of my age. J would like to wait until late spring or early summer and I think I am okay with that. I do not want to get ourselves in such a financial bind that we are in trouble down the road. It also gives me time to lose some weight and get healthier before moving forward.
Dr. A did offer us a discounted IUI if we'd like to do that with my next cycle. I think I like that idea but the fear of another miscarriage is there. I don't think my chances of getting pregnant from an IUI are high, but who knows after having the surgeries and a nice clean ute...maybe it could happen??
So many thoughts are swirling through my head...maybe we could get lucky with a spontaneous pregnancy during this cycle?? We are bringing sexytime back and it's been fun :) so maybe we'll get lucky the old-fashioned way?!?! A girl can dream, right?? ;)
We also have stuff going on with Garnett...while he was at the ranch during our break he was seizure-free but the other night we had multiple false alarms and it made both J and I really nervous. (In order to get clear of the area I jumped over the back of the couch during the first false alarm.) I spoke to the vet about it and he said it seemed like the seizure was trying to break through. The next step would be to see a neurologist. I have no idea how much that would cost. We are working on getting an estimate. I asked my Mom if we might be able to borrow some money from her for this...it's so odd, I wouldn't borrow money from her for my own treatments, but when it came to Garnett I had no problem asking about it.
As for our trip home to MA - it was fun. Much more relaxing than other trips. I was so anxious about going home this year and I am really happy to report it was a great trip. I had plenty of Dunkin Donuts coffee! I missed out on some things...real apple cider, a trip to the beach, going out to breakfast at my favorite diner by the beach... I was able to see friends I haven't seen in a couple of years, which was really good. I needed my friend time. Best of all, there was no family drama!!
As always, thanks for listening! Happy Friday Y'all!
The limbo is so tough. Be easy on yourself. Continue to do research, but give yourself the time and breath to think things over. You don't need to make a decision by the end of the week... or next.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry about the situation with Garnett. My heart breaks for you. I hope you can find the answers you need for him soon. Thinking of you.
Thank you so much for your kind words.
DeleteWe were lucky enough to get an appointment for a consultation for Garnett for this afternoon...it makes me feel better that we'll get this ball rolling today.
Man, it sounds like you almost have to many choices in front of you! I say go with your gut... and most important, try to set out a schedule, so you have concrete dates to work toward (especially if you have any health or weight loss goals). You need something to look forward to, even if that something is just another IUI. And yes, I have heard that sex can lead to babies, so you never know! :)
ReplyDeleteThank you :) Who knows maybe that sex thing will work?!? lol
DeleteFirst of all, let me say that I think you are an amazing woman. You are so strong, and you do have some decisions in front of you. But as others have said, you don't have to rush them. One fo the best things I've done for myself is just focusing on my health (mentally and physically) and letting the TTC be for even just a month. It was so great and definitely what I needed.
ReplyDeleteAnd I'm so sorry about your pupper. I'm thinking good thoughts for him.
Thank you so much!! I realized this weekend that I had no idea what cycle day I was on and loved it! Going to try focusing on me instead of my cycle for a month or two!
Delete