Pig

I really wanted to title my post "Why me?" but I wanted to add some positive to this post as well so I am going to start with the positve before I go on to the not-so-positive.

I am not sure if I've let it be known or not that I am somewhat obsessed with Dave Matthews. One day last week I was having a rough time during my ride home so I did what I always do when I am feeling down...I turned on Dave. The song Pig started playing, well normally, I would just sing along and start feeling better thinking about the time I saw him play at Fenway and he opened with Pig. Um, not this time. I started really listening to the lyrics and started balling. When I heard these lyrics I thought of all of you and the love & support I have received.

This love will open our world
From the dark side we can see a glow of something bright
Oh, there's much more than we see here

I really don't know how I would have made it through this last loss without you. From the bottom of my heart, thank you so very much for being there for me.

Now for the zingers...had my follow-up hcg test today. I am at 9...why can't it be below 5 already!??! Looks like I have to go back again next Monday. :( I am hoping that the pathology report will be back this week so I can meet with Dr. A on the same day I go in for the blood draw. One a positive note, our nurse has been the one doing the blood draws...no sympathetic looks and no bruises!!

Major zinger of the weekend...J and I went to the yard sales in the neighborhood on Saturday during the community yard sale. It wasn't easy because my original plan had been to look for baby stuff but I changed it to wanting to look for a cast iron pan and a weed whacker instead. Fail on both of those, but we did find some bargains and some heartache. When we stopped at one sale the woman said "I just have baby stuff and this entertainment center." J replied "Thanks, we don't need baby stuff or an entertainment center." The woman chuckled and said "Oh, all done having babies?" J smiled and we walked away. J grabbed my hand and asked if we could just go home and cry. I said I wanted to reply with "Yup, having 4 die was enough for us." I am really glad I didn't...it's not her fault and what good would it have done to make her feel horrible. We talked about it more than once and kept on trucking.

To end on a positive note, I am happy to report that I thoroughly enjoyed my "Two-Buck Chuck" from Trader Joe's this weekend!!