I'll see if I can make a long story a bit shorter for those who still keep up with us. :)
What caused us to finally make the decision was a safety issue last week at M's Halloween field trip. The kids went to a memory care unit for trick-or-treating. This was M's second field trip, because it was going to involve candy/allergens J and I decided we'd both attend. I am SO glad we did!! When the kids got off the bus I looked M's teacher and realized she didn't have anything with her to indicate she was carrying M's Auvi-Q (epinephrine), so I casually asked her if she had it. She replied "No, it's on the bus." I asked her if she could please get it, so it would be on her body just in case anything happened. She looked outside and said "Oh, that's the bus that just went back to school." SAY WHAT?!!? Thankfully, because J and I were there, J had the other set with him, so at no point with M without his medication. The reaction I received when she realized the medicine was on the bus was complete apathy...no concern, panic, remorse...none of that. It was pretty much at that moment we decided M was done with that school.
We had other incidents that led us to our decision surrounding M's happiness. In the past 6 or so weeks, his mood/behavior at home has changed. He has begged us not to take him to school and told us that he's going to sleep all the school days and only wake for weekends. One of the days I was taking M to school he screamed at me to not turn left onto the road that would bring us to school. When we got to the street for his school he again yelled at me...he saw a yellow traffic sign and said "See Mommy, you can't go - the sign says 'Turn around - don't drown!" (A common saying in our area during the rain - it had been raining for a week at this point.) It was heart-breaking.
J and I also had our own issues with the teacher. Her communication skills were lacking to say the least. She never told us in person how M was doing in school. At the beginning of the year we did receive a message telling us that M was doing great in class and she could not wait to see how he was going to grow during the year. If we tried to start a conversation, we received one word answers. It was just bizarre.
We did speak to the Director of the school, hoping she could shed some light on the situation for us. Unfortunately, she was as clueless as we were. She spoke with the teacher, but nothing changed. We met with the Director and the owner today to explain why we were leaving. I am glad we did but I am exhausted now...I feel like we've just gone through a break-up. Thankfully, I do feel like we got closure. For whatever reason, our family and the teacher did not click.
M is day #3 at his new school and is happier than he's been in a long time!
First off, sending you so much love. I get the break-up feeling because you did end a relationship.
ReplyDeleteI still remember the trauma we faced when we moved Teddy and Maddy out of one of their schools when it became clear the situation was bad. It wasn't until we saw them thriving in their new schools that it became clear how much they were struggling and suffering, which left me with a ton of quilt and anger that I'm still processing to this day. We pick schools and care givers based on an assumption that they will be giving our kids the best things possible. It sucks when those care givers break that trust.
I'm very glad you advocated for M. This situation did not sound safe (who leaves epipens and other needed emergency medications on a bus?!?!). I'm also glad you met with both the director and the owner. They needed to be made aware of what happened.
May this new school be a good one.
Oh wow. That school definitely does not sound like the place for him! I hope things continue to go well for him at the new school. :)
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